Monday, April 9, 2012

Happy [day after] Easter!

We had such a delightful Easter weekend.
I think it was the best weekend I've had in a long time.

Philip was off of work starting Good Friday, and since he's been working so much it was so great to hog him to ourselves for three whole days.

We had an even,full mixture of worship, productivity, cuddling, and playing this weekend.
I made a conscious effort to really step aside from culture this weekend.

I wanted to be living with a reason instead of a tradition.
I wanted to be in the moments instead of photographing them.

I've spent so many Easter weekends of my life having no clue or care for the substance and just celebrating over Peeps and pastel colored plastic eggs.
I wanted this one to be different for me and our family.
I wanted to do it right.

Philip and I were talking about how there is just so much "stuff" in our lives.
"Stuff" that doesn't even matter in the end of this life.
Through what Jesus did for us we have been given the gift of eternal life.
Once our bodies stop pumping blood and we take our last breath, we have a gift given to us only through the blood of Jesus. I haven't understood this sacrifice for most of my life. I haven't even lived it boldly and declared it through most of my saved life.
I was created to glorify God, and it's time we start doing that not just when a holiday prompts us, not just when it's Sunday, not just when we're desperate for Him.
 Every. single. day. All the time. 
Once heaven is our new home, the "stuff" here was just a waste.
We're so busy spending minutes and hours and days doing things that won't even matter to our eternal life.

I had a convicting week.
 and I love those. 

My heart was so open and full this weekend, and I loved so much.

Thursday evening or Friday evening Philip took us out for ice cream and snowballs. We waited patiently while a large family in front of us ordered. Adeline was elbow deep in Philip's pockets searching for quarters to play games with, and Gideon was hanging on my hip kicking my belly and impatiently grunting for the ice cream a family was enjoying at a table near us.
A kind man made small talk with Philip and asked him about the ages of our children.
He noticed I was pregnant and he smiled and shared the love he had for his own 9 grand children pointing to a few sitting at a table waiting for their ice cream.
He finished his order and moved aside so we could make ours, but before he went to his family he looked at Philip and said, "Do me a favor? Give those kids God. Show them who Jesus is."
Philip smiled as Adeline was already making her ice cream order for a scoop of chocolate and Gideon was whining to get down. He just replied with, "Oh yes sir."
 I loved this man's boldness, promptness.
Just strangers with kids in an ice cream shop and he shared Jesus.

Sometimes I'm a jerk though.
and then I was a jerk.
Because instead of being humble, I was proud.
I immediately thought, "Man, I wish there were another family here. I wish there we someone standing right here who didn't know Jesus and who really needed the bluntness intermingled with sweetness reminding them what our jobs as parents should be. My mind carried on while I imagined different families that "should" have been in that situation and what their reactions would have been.
I told you I was a jerk sometimes.

So while I'm in my own world, the cashier gives Philip his receipt and I notice the total was way bigger than the kids' ice cream and our snowballs.
Jerk Courtney said something along the lines of, "Ughhh that's way too much she charged you."
and Philip discreetly told me he paid for that families ice cream.
I said, "Oh, ok. That's cool. Why?"
and Philip just said, "That man just shared Jesus with a stranger. That's a good reason for free ice cream."

Man. That's true.
and Philip never even felt the need to profess our faith or admit that we do teach our children God, and that we are active in our church, or that we have a rich prayer life with our kids. None of that mattered.
He was humble while I was proud.

aaaaaand I'm a jerk.

We all need Jesus, even when we do have Him.
You don't need Him anymore than I need him. 
I want to love Him more every day.
I want Him to teach me more every day. 

So there in my conviction I took that man's advice all weekend long.
"Give those kids God, Show them who Jesus is."

and while so many times during this Easter weekend I could have fallen into traditions of our society and "stuff" in our culture we took a lot of careful time to worship the God that sacrificed himself for me. It was a weekend we need to apply to all of our days.

and while a part of me is a little bummed I didn't even get a photo of my kids in their cute yellow Easter clothes, more of me is so filled with gratitude, and the fullness that I can only find at the foot of the cross.
Because in our eternal lives, I don't think it will matter that my kids have no clue what people are talking about when they ask what the bunny brought them.

I have a lot to learn, and a long way to grow. But I think God has me right where He wants me, and I'm ready to listen.


  1. this post is the best thing I've read in awhile. There are seriously tears in my eyes :)